Get all 68 Arthur Durkee releases available on Bandcamp and save 35%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Gangsa, Vol. 2, All Is Calm, All Is Bright (Album 2023), Ambire Musica, Dangerous Odds: Colors of Green, Tiki Takataapui, Tempest Elegies, Bamboo, Avalanche Vortex, and 60 more.
1. |
||||
|
My Home in the Heartlands
Quiet town
early morning
blue twilight
in the east
here in my heart
here is my home
Here is a place
my home in the heartlands
a small town
just a dot on the map
no one’s ever heard of
where no one ever goes
Open prairie skies
endless sea of grass
storms you can see a long way off
light and shadow coming near
listen to the wind
We gather together
our hands joined in circle
our neighborly ways
are rooted in sharing
we build by the river
we build a round barn
the hearth is our circle
our home on this earth
Keep one eye on the sky
listen to the wind
river, cross my heart
river, carry me home
|
||||
2. |
Secret Waltzes
03:25
|
|||
|
Secret Waltzes
In high school I dated girls,
I thought I was straight,
No one there was gay.
I went through the motions,
I played the right games,
Still I couldn’t love my girl.
Then life turned a corner,
gave me a chance
to know who I was,
to be free.
I traveled to Europe
for one year of study—
suddenly, I was free!
The place, the people, the food!
I was thrilled to be alive!
Then I met him.
It felt so natural
to hold hands, to kiss,
to make love, to laugh.
I said to myself, “I’m gay!”
I dated a man all year,
I lived openly, I loved openly—
but then I had to go home.
Back home in the Midwest
I went back in the closet
of my fraternity.
But I started to notice
I wasn’t alone,
i wasn’t the only one.
I saw men I knew
at the dance, at the bar.
We don’t talk about it,
we’re the soul of discretion,
we waltz our waltz silently.
But we smile to each other
in church, in college,
at work, in our family.
We live and let live
We love and let love
We know who we are
and we’re free.
|
||||
3. |
The Voices in My Head
03:09
|
|||
|
The Voices In My Head
You got to fit in
Don’t ever stand out
Don’t think for yourself
Don’t stand up and shout
Being different’s a sin
It won’t get you friends
You know what that means
It’s a means to an end
Don’t laugh
Don’t cry
Too much
You know why
Nobody you love
Will ever love you
If they knew who you were
They’d walk out on you
Got to keep it inside
Wherever you go
There are things in your heart
Nobody can know
Don’t talk
Don’t speak
Hold your tongue
You look weak
Don’t walk like a girl
Don’t simper and sigh
Got to act like a man
It’s do it or die
Take care of your act
Oretend you’re alright
Don’t appear to be soft
This is no place to fight
Be aquare
Don’t care
Be cool
Not a fool (no fool)
You’ve got a big secret
We don’t want to know
Don’t tell us your troubles
Just get up and go
Go back in that closet
Don’t dare to come out
Live alone in your head
Where there’s never a doubt
You will
Be syill
Shut up
Take a pill
You’ve got to fit in
Don’t dare to stick out
Get back in that closet
Don’t ever come out
Conform to the norm
Don’t mess up your life
Your family loves you
If you’d just get a wife!
Shut up / Sit down / Be like us / In our town
(Don’t laugh / Don’t cry / etc. to end)
|
||||
4. |
Now We Are Three
02:06
|
|||
|
Now We Are Three
I was one
gay son
in our family
Mother disowned me
Then my brother
made two
gay sons
in our family
Mother did not know
what to do
Now we are three
gay kids
in our family
Mother still loves me
she’s come around
she’s come around
|
||||
5. |
||||
|
Warrior Marks (a song against bullies)
Against all adverstiy
I have survived
Despite all you’ve done to me
I hold my head high
You took away my dignity
But I kept my pride
You tried to take my history
But I kept it alive
REFRAIN: My warrior marks
are the scars on my heart,
life’s lessons I learned
[make] these marks that I’ve earned
I will live on
I will survive
I face down the bullies
their words like knives
I lived through the torture
of living a lie
You try to make me sacrifice
Everything I ever loved
You twist my life into a lie
To pay a bitter cost
BRIDGE: But I’m free as of now
Victor not victim.
No more of your hatred!
Make me a pilgrim.
I can make of my life
Whatever I choose
I’ve got just enough courage
To see myself through
REFRAIN: My warrior marks. . .
BRIDGE 2:
When the only way out
Is a closet door
When trying to fit in
Gets you blood on the floor
When you lift up your head
You get hurt all the more—
Why bother? Who cares?
Why speak out? Who dares?
I’ve risen too far
To ever back down
At the close of this journey
I’m all that I own
I chased down my demons
I burned them away
In my enemy’s fire
I forged a new day
REFRAIN:
My warrior marks
are the wounds on my soul,
these burns that I’ve healed
my scars now made whole
I will live on
I will survive
I will live on
I will survive
I am alive
I am alive
I will thrive!
|
||||
6. |
Can You (Love Me Enough)
02:44
|
|||
|
Can You?
Can you love me enough to let me go?
Here we are in this sky full of lightning
Striking ‘round us as we fight for our lives.
Can you still say we’re nothing but comrades
When we made love all night? I know your heart.
Did you want to love me or did you just love yourself too much?
Can you ever love someone who loves you or are you too proud
To see who loves you who can always love you matter what?
can you make up your mind, just love me and let me go, let go now?ˆ
Here we are in this room full of silence
Echoing ‘round us as we run through our lives.
[echo: we through our lives]
Can you run far enough to forget me?
Shadows turn into dawn. I have your heart.
[echo: I’m in your heart]
Do you need a folk song to tell me I love you one more time?
Would the words be more true if they were sweet or if they were harsh?
Can you sing me a song that comes fromm your heart or will you pine
For some version of me that I am not, for some fantasy?
Can we just love each other?
Just be in love and let it go?
|
||||
7. |
When We Sing
05:49
|
|||
|
When We Sing
We sing because we love
We sing because we must
There’s a world of song around us
A world not always just
When we sing We feel alive
When we sing We are free
When we sing We gather memories
When we sing We are at peace
We sing because we suffer
We sing so we can fly
For all who feel this hunger
We sing ourselves alive
When we sing We are lovers
When we sing We will survive
When we sing We will recover
What we needed For our lives
In a world full of people
There’s only some
that want to fly
In a time full of hardship
Only some want
to help each other
Why would we want to live in fear?
There are some
who want to learn to love
In a world full of darkened skies
We are the ones
Who want to fly
want to fly / who want to fly
We sing out every morning
We sing the sky at noon
Sing in the summer thunder
Sing out the winter gloom
When we sing Nothing can hurt you
When we sing We are safe
When we sing Song is our refuge
When we sing Our home in place
Music comes from heaven
It gathers in our skies
With stars above us wheeling
We sing the world to life
When we sing We are aline
When we sing We are free
There’s a world Of song within us
We sing out through our lives
through our lives we sing
in the skies we sing
to each other we sing
for all time
|
||||
Arthur Durkee Ann Arbor, Michigan
Arthur Durkee is a composer & songwriter who records & performs on Chapman Stick, bass, analog modular synths, bamboo & wood flutes, keys, frame drums, and voice. He has won awards for composed, notated music as well as for his recordings, & is a published poet, & designer & illustrator. ... more
If you like Arthur Durkee, you may also like:
Meeting with a Judas Tree
by Duval Timothy
The London composer's latest album is a document of both the joy and impermanence of life.
go to album
Son
by Rosie Lowe & Duval Timothy
featured on Bandcamp Radio Oct 18, 2021
go to album
Anthracite Fields
by Julia Wolfe featuring Bang on a Can All-Stars & Choir of Trinity Wall Street
Emotive oratorio about Pennsylvania miners & recipient of 2015 Pulitzer Prize for distinguished musical composition.
go to album
Experimental music, drone, and neo-classical combine in this world-building record, breathtaking and expansive.
go to album
The latest from the UK musician lives at the crossroads of jazz and electronic music.
go to album
The Kenya Reworks
by Sven Kacirek
featured on Bandcamp Radio Oct 8, 2019
go to album
Things That Grow
by Cara Stacey
Stacey teams up with members of Polar Bear to create enchanting and hypnotic music from southern African bows.
go to album
