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1. |
Great Lakes Prairie Dawn
04:03
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Great Lakes Prairie Dawn
texts based on themes from regional Native American songs and stories
Mother Earth
Sky, our Brother
Lake, our Father
Life, our Sister
Mother Earth
make us whole
Earth, our Mother
make us strong
heal us
Father Lake
wind over inland sea
at the dawn
shining waters
we are here
to greet the morning
of the world
Father of song
Mother of seed
Brother of thunder
Sister of fire
teach us love
honor, compassion
eye of the day sees everything
with the eye of the heart
we help each other
the sacredness of life
bound to the land
we live our days
bound to each other
with love
with love
Earth, our Mother
bring rain to wash us
Lake, our Father
wind to cleanse us
sun is risen
sun to warm us
day begins
soil to give us life
sun is risen
day begins
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2. |
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My Home in the Heartlands
Quiet town
early morning
blue twilight
in the east
here in my heart
here is my home
Here is a place
my home in the heartlands
a small town
just a dot on the map
no one’s ever heard of
where no one ever goes
Open prairie skies
endless sea of grass
storms you can see a long way off
light and shadow coming near
listen to the wind
We gather together
our hands joined in circle
our neighborly ways
are rooted in sharing
we build by the river
we build a round barn
the hearth is our circle
our home on this earth
Keep one eye on the sky
listen to the wind
river, cross my heart
river, carry me home
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3. |
Alone
03:01
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Alone
I was alone
under this giant sky
Alone
I was the only one
like me
I was alone
before you came to me
Alone
after you went away
alone
I can be alone
in rooms full of people
I have learned
to guard those secrets well
that made me so alone
In the world, there
must be others like me
Alone
but I’m the only one
right here
I am alone
in my little town, you
know me
you don’t know me at all
Alone
Alone
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4. |
Secret Waltzes
03:40
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Secret Waltzes
In high school I dated girls,
I thought I was straight,
No one there was gay.
I went through the motions,
I played the right games,
Still I couldn’t love my girl.
Then life turned a corner,
gave me a chance
to know who I was,
to be free.
I traveled to Europe
for one year of study—
suddenly, I was free!
The place, the people, the food!
I was thrilled to be alive!
Then I met him.
It felt so natural
to hold hands, to kiss,
to make love, to laugh.
I said to myself, “I’m gay!”
I dated a man all year,
I lived openly, I loved openly—
but then I had to go home.
Back home in the Midwest
I went back in the closet
of my fraternity.
But I started to notice
I wasn’t alone,
i wasn’t the only one.
I saw men I knew
at the dance, at the bar.
We don’t talk about it,
we’re the soul of discretion,
we waltz our waltz silently.
But we smile to each other
in church, in college,
at work, in our family.
We live and let live
We love and let love
We know who we are
and we’re free.
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5. |
Fearless Heart
02:00
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Fearless Heart
I wish I had a fearless heart
I wish I could be brave and cool
I wish I knew which tale was true
The apple or the serpent’s part
I wish I could be wild and strong
I wish I could sing my own song
I’d never need to live a lie
i’d welcome every roving eye
I wonder if he’ll ever know
I wish I could just tell him so
I’d give him half my heart to share
If I could just get past my fear
I wish I had a fearless heart
Together we’d be brave and smart
This private garden makes a start
Someday we’ll build the wilder part
That day I find my fearless heart
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6. |
The Voices In My Head
03:34
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The Voices In My Head
You got to fit in
Don’t ever stand out
Don’t think for yourself
Don’t stand up and shout
Being different’s a sin
It won’t get you friends
You know what that means
It’s a means to an end
Don’t laugh
Don’t cry
Too much
You know why
Nobody you love
Will ever love you
If they knew who you were
They’d walk out on you
Got to keep it inside
Wherever you go
There are things in your heart
Nobody can know
Don’t talk
Don’t speak
Hold your tongue
You look weak
Don’t walk like a girl
Don’t simper and sigh
Got to act like a man
It’s do it or die
Take care of your act
Oretend you’re alright
Don’t appear to be soft
This is no place to fight
Be aquare
Don’t care
Be cool
Not a fool (no fool)
You’ve got a big secret
We don’t want to know
Don’t tell us your troubles
Just get up and go
Go back in that closet
Don’t dare to come out
Live alone in your head
Where there’s never a doubt
You will
Be syill
Shut up
Take a pill
You’ve got to fit in
Don’t dare to stick out
Get back in that closet
Don’t ever come out
Conform to the norm
Don’t mess up your life
Your family loves you
If you’d just get a wife!
Shut up / Sit down / Be like us / In our town
(Don’t laugh / Don’t cry / etc. to end)
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7. |
Now We Are Three
01:58
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Now We Are Three
I was one
gay son
in our family
Mother disowned me
Then my brother
made two
gay sons
in our family
Mother did not know
what to do
Now we are three
gay kids
in our family
Mother still loves me
she’s come around
she’s come around
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8. |
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Seven Haiku About the Great Lakes
far northern summer
skinnydipping in the lake—
sunshine, making love
above these high cliffs
blackwinged raven croaks and soars—
Superior vistas
all summer long
we boys browned on white sand beach
growing into life
windy summer noon—
sailboats on Lake Michigan
white petals on green
pines near the lakeshore
covering rocks with shadows—
Mackinac Island
music of the heart:
small green frogs in April
calling their mates
long evening shadows
darken cedar cabin walls
as we watch the sky
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9. |
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Warrior Marks” (a song against bullies)
Against all adverstiy
I have survived
Despite all you’ve done to me
I hold my head high
You took away my dignity
But I kept my pride
You tried to take my history
But I kept it alive
REFRAIN: My warrior marks
are the scars on my heart,
life’s lessons I learned
[make] these marks that I’ve earned
I will live on
I will survive
I face down the bullies
their words like knives
I lived through the torture
of living a lie
You try to make me sacrifice
Everything I ever loved
You twist my life into a lie
To pay a bitter cost
BRIDGE: But I’m free as of now
Victor not victim.
No more of your hatred!
Make me a pilgrim.
I can make of my life
Whatever I choose
I’ve got just enough courage
To see myself through
REFRAIN: My warrior marks. . .
BRIDGE 2:
When the only way out
Is a closet door
When trying to fit in
Gets you blood on the floor
When you lift up your head
You get hurt all the more—
Why bother? Who cares?
Why speak out? Who dares?
I’ve risen too far
To ever back down
At the close of this journey
I’m all that I own
I chased down my demons
I burned them away
In my enemy’s fire
I forged a new day
REFRAIN:
My warrior marks
are the wounds on my soul,
these burns that I’ve healed
my scars now made whole
I will live on
I will survive
I will live on
I will survive
I am alive
I am alive
I will thrive!
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10. |
Folk Song
04:33
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Folk Song
When trees burn gold in autumn
and the river runs cold and blue,
I first met my own true love
under orchard trees rough-hwen
I gave my love an apple
and he gavae one to me,
we kissed beneath the golden maple
and made our vows to be.
To be true to each other,
to live forever, clinging,
like the vine that loves the tree,
like the river flows to the sea.
When autumn turned to winter,
my love gave the snow to me,
I gave him back the winter moon,
we kissed icicles off trees
All under white spring blossoms,
we loved in new green grass,
my love and I went to the river
to wash ourselves in grace.
To be true to each other,
to live forever, clinging,
like the vine that loves the tree,
like the river flows to the sea.
But the river took my love from me,
swept away to distant seas,
now autumn apples come again,
and I am left alone.
When trees burn gold in autumn
and the river runs cold and blue,
I first met my own true love
under apple trees full soon.
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11. |
Can You (Love Me Enough)
02:48
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Can You?
Can you love me enough to let me go?
Here we are in this sky full of lightning
Striking ‘round us as we fight for our lives.
Can you still say we’re nothing but comrades
When we made love all night? I know your heart.
Did you want to love me or did you just love yourself too much?
Can you ever love someone who loves you or are you too proud
To see who loves you who can always love you matter what?
can you make up your mind, just love me and let me go, let go now?ˆ
Here we are in this room full of silence
Echoing ‘round us as we run through our lives.
[echo: we through our lives]
Can you run far enough to forget me?
Shadows turn into dawn. I have your heart.
[echo: I’m in your heart]
Do you need a folk song to tell me I love you one more time?
Would the words be more true if they were sweet or if they were harsh?
Can you sing me a song that comes fromm your heart or will you pine
For some version of me that I am not, for some fantasy?
Can we just love each other?
Just be in love and let it go?
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12. |
Night
03:13
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Night
Night
walking the dirt road
at the edge of the field
moonless night full of stars
millions of stars so bright
I can see the dirt
I can see my boots
road rising into the sky
celestrail road
Night
edge of the lake
mirror still waters
night full of stars
silver light filling the sky
and reflecting in the lake
stars above, stars at my feet
mist rising near the shore
celestial lake
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13. |
Brushwork/Canvas
03:06
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Brushwork/Canvas
I draw runes on your skin
a labyrinth of circles
over your heart
I draw my name on your breast
an arrow pointing down
from navel to root of sex
I draw chevrons on your arms
sentinel of my self
warrior guarding my soul
I draw your name on my breast
and as we press ourselves together
ink runs from skin to skin
as we imprint ourselves on each other
ink brothers, blood brothers, one
naked self to naked soul
naked soul to naked skin
writing our names
on each others’ arms
blood brothers, ink brothers, one
my only loving brother
we are one
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14. |
Dulcimer Song
02:50
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Dulcimer Song
The parlor piano
around which we sang
the wheezing old organ
that led us in hymns
Daddy played the dulcimer
while Mama sang loud
and these were our Sundays
in our little farm town
When we worship
in the chapel
hear the singing
angels inside
When we sit down
to our supper
hearing the humming
insects outside
Sundays were for singing
preacher telling us how to live
But I had my secret ways
I went out to worship
in the wheatfield
under the sun
When we worship
in the chapel
hear the singing
angels inside
When we sit down
to our supper
hearing the humming
angels outside
angels outside
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15. |
We Are Your Neighbors
02:57
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We Are Your Neighbors
We are your neighbors
we are your sons
your sons and daughters
who you have loved
We gather with you
comunally
we are your neighbors
your family
Community
is all of us
we live together
from birth to dust
We are everyone
you know in school
we go to market
swim at the pool
Sing hymns in church
sing holding hands
rhythm of seasons
tied to the land
God and creation
held in our arms
see birth and death
grown up on farms
We live beside you
work the same job
join hands in labor
one of the mob
Know the same people
hardships and joys
work with each other
to build our lives
Voices of loving
land of desire
can’t change who we are
creation’s choir
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16. |
Silences Here
07:28
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Silences Here
Sometimes
the world steps back
into a kind of distance
in the silence
hawk flies
from storm to tree
all the world’s
an open sky
and every stillness gathers
into one
some nights
when snow is thick
around the weathered hilltops
and deep valleys
then we
from sun to sea
fill the world
with starlit trees
till winter candles gather
into one
some days
[in] early summer
lilacs fill the evening air
with their sweetness
we sit
our sunset yard
till it’s dusk
too dark to see
fireflies rise and gather
into one
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17. |
I Come from a Good Home
03:21
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I Come From a Good Home
I come from a good home,
I left it behind.
My people were loving,
they did not mind.
But I couldn’t stay home,
I needed to roam,
I sought out a larger world,
To call it my own.
I left for a dream
of what could be.
I made a new home,
a new family.
But now I wonder
what I left behind.
Did I take a wrong turn,
can I change my mind?
Was I too long in running?
Can I ever go home?
I come from a long road
I wanted to roam.
Now here is the doorstep,
Here is my home.
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18. |
Wheatfields
02:35
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Wheatfields
I sat in the back seat
om the long drive to church,
I was trapped in the coffin
of my Sunday clothes
Jacket too warm, collar too tight,
I saw the wheatfield
I played in all summer
as the family car drove by
Sunlight flashed through roadside trees
while the endless wheat
bent under summer sun
where I ran shirtless yesterday
Though still just a boy
I thought to myself:
I could praise God better
from this acre of grass
Than I ever could have done
in church, and more purely;
I could praise all Creation,
I could sing a wheat psalm
That was the morning
I threw open my heart
I saw God in the world
and the vision has never ended.
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19. |
When We Sing (Finale)
06:20
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When We Sing
We sing because we love
We sing because we must
There’s a world of song around us
A world not always just
When we sing We feel alive
When we sing We are free
When we sing We gather memories
When we sing We are at peace
We sing because we suffer
We sing so we can fly
For all who feel this hunger
We sing ourselves alive
When we sing We are lovers
When we sing We will survive
When we sing We will recover
What we needed For our lives
In a world full of people
There’s only some
that want to fly
In a time full of hardship
Only some want
to help each other
Why would we want to live in fear?
There are some
who want to learn to love
In a world full of darkened skies
We are the ones
Who want to fly
want to fly / who want to fly
We sing out every morning
We sing the sky at noon
Sing in the summer thunder
Sing out the winter gloom
When we sing Nothing can hurt you
When we sing We are safe
When we sing Song is our refuge
When we sing Our home in place
Music comes from heaven
It gathers in our skies
With stars above us wheeling
We sing the world to life
When we sing We are aline
When we sing We are free
There’s a world Of song within us
We sing out through our lives
through our lives we sing
in the skies we sing
to each other we sing
for all time
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Arthur Durkee Ann Arbor, Michigan
Arthur Durkee is a composer & songwriter who records & performs on Chapman Stick, bass, analog modular synths, bamboo & wood flutes, keys, frame drums, and voice. He has won awards for composed, notated music as well as for his recordings, & is a published poet, & designer & illustrator. ... more
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